Ich bedanke mich bei Ernie aus NY, der auch einige Kommentare dazugeschrieben hat
so nennen wir die Südstaatenbewohner, besonders die, die sehr rückständig
sind, wie die, die in den Bergen von Kentucky und Tennessee
your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
Thanksgiving Day you have to decide which pet to eat.
ever come home and found crime scene tape across your
favorite entree is Spam barbecued on the grill.
child's first words were "Attention K-Mart
K-Mart = Aldi
idea of high-quality entertainment is a six-pack and a
ever won first prize in a tobacco spittin contest.
got more than one brother named "Darryl"
stare at an orange juice container because it says
think watching professional wrestling is foreplay.
front porch collapses and four dogs get killed.
no longer drink wine ever since the screw cap got cought
up your nose.
think that "Dom Perignon" is a mafia leader.
billboard that says "SAY NO TO CRACK" reminds
you to pull up your jeans.
wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.
go to your family reunion looking for a date.
think a Volvo is part of a woman's anatomy.
Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare.
got more than three cousins named "Bubba."
think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are
"gentlemen, start your engines"
never learned to swim because your gene pool is too
family tree has no forks.
think the OJ Trial is a Sunkist and Minutemaid taste
Sunkist & M = Orange Juice
believe dual air bags refer to your wife and
have refused to watch the Academy Awards since
"Smokey and the Bandit" was snubbed for best
Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than
brother-in-law is your uncle and your grandfather.
had to remove a toothpick for your wedding pictures.
use a weedeater in your living room.
consider your license plate personalized because your dad
made it in prison.
have a rag for a gas cap.
blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending
on how much gas it has in it.
Blue book = Wertverzeichnis für Gebrauchtwagen
have to go outside to get something out of the
seven course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack.
Kentucky Fried Chicken franchise
have spray painted your girlfriend's name on an overpass.
lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
asks to see your ID and you show them your belt buckle.
have lost at least one tooth opening a beer bottle.
Daniels makes your list of "most admired
dog can't watch you eat without getting sick.
think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major
dad walks you to school because you are both in the same
house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.
need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie
at the House of Tattoos.
have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your front
your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the
keys to the tractor.
think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were just
the fifth grade is referred to as "your senior
quarters of the clothes you own have LOGOS on them.
`huntin dawg' cost more than the truck you drive him
belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.
been to a funeral and there were more pick-ups than cars.
just bought an 8-track player to put in your truck.
ever climbed a water tower with a bucket of paint to
defend your sister's honor.
easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than mow it.
think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue and Primer Gray
are the three primary colors.
John Deere=Traktoren, Primer
pickup has a two-tone paint job -- primer red and primer
can't get married to yer sweetheart cause there is a law
been on TV more than 5 times describing the sound of a
dated your daddy's current wife in high school.
aunt and your grandmother went to the funeral and had a
fight over who gets to be the widow.
can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub.
can change the oil in your truck without ducking your
your senior year you and your mother had homeroom
entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from
the Governor to spare a loved one.
wife has ever said: "Come move this transmission so
I can take a bath."
refer to the time you won a free case of motor oil as
"the day my ship came in."
have the local taxidermist's number on speed dial.
school fight song is "Dueling Banjos".
Aus dem Film "Deliverance"
mit Burt Reynolds
think "taking out the trash" means taking your
in-laws to a movie.
coffee table used to be a cable spool.
hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to
make it look nice.
Home Shopping operator recognized your voice.
HSO=Verkäufer vom HS, wo man
die Waren im TV sieht.
have every episode of Hee-Haw on tape.
Hee-Haw=1970er TV Show aus den Südstaaten
ever been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
kids take a siphon hose to "Show and Tell."
think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture.
gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot.
think the French Riviera is a foreign car.
Hot=slang für gestohlen
toilet paper has page numbers on it.
ever had to scratch your sisters name out of a message
that begins,"For a good time time call..."
wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so
Amer. Tankstellen sind saudreckig.
ever done your Christmas shopping at a truck stop.
in your family died right after saying "Hey, Y'all
think God looks a lot like Hank Williams, Jr., and heaven
looks a lot like Daytona Beach, Florida.
Daytona Beach = Autorennen
FBI surrounded your trailer park twice so far this year.
have the word "howdy" in your answering machine
wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state
painted a car with house paint.
ever named a child after a dog.
grade was the best six years of your life.
think taking a bubble bath starts with eating beans for